28 January 2010

The first appearance of Frak

is in the third episode of the original Battlestar Galactica. :-)

Battlestar Galactica old skool

Hulu recently posted the first twenty-four episodes of the original Battlestar Galactica. This show is almost as old as me! The series first aired in September of 1978, only a few months after I was born. TV is so much smarter and thoughtful these days (with the exception of Star Trek TNG of course!), so it's been a blast to watch scifi from the 70s. While the plot lines and special effects have gotten better in today's scifi, it's also been great to see that some things remain the same. In Star Trek, there's an instantaneous language translator, and I just noticed that the BSG warriors carry a "Languatron" for translation purposes too. :-)

25 January 2010

This is why people shouldn't let their pets run loose

Because not everyone will stop for animals crossing the street.

A cat which became famous for catching the same bus every day for four years has been run over and killed - while crossing the road to catch its daily lift.

Crafty Casper died in a hit and run accident as he tried to board the No3 service.   

He hopped on the bus around 10am every morning and sat on the back seat throughout its entire 11 mile route.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1244106/Cat-boarded-bus-day-years-killed-hit-run.html#ixzz0ibbgxC6z

11 January 2010

I can't believe you just upped my credit limit

Dear Credit Card Company Which Shall Remain Unnamed,

I'm unemployed. I've been unemployed since November of 2008.

I'm transient. In the past 14 months, I've been in six different countries and traversed opposite sides of the globe.

Finally, I'm homeless. I gave up my apartment in August and have been living with friends and family since.

So, why in the world would you up my credit limit? I have no means of repaying any money I spend, and I shouldn't really be in the position to spend indiscriminately. It's highly irresponsible of you to provide me additional credit, and I'm pretty sure if you keep this up, you'll soon be the subject of a congressional hearing.

10 January 2010

Wow, other peoples' parents say the same things to them too!

M sent this website over to me, and I feel better.

Postcards from Yo Momma

It's good to know other peoples' parents say outrageous things to their children too.

07 January 2010

Back from Hong Kong!

I got back from Hong Kong last night, and I've a lot to do this year in an effort to reconnect with my Asianness:

First, I have to rehearse my new repertoire of asian picture poses. I thought that all I had to do was make a V with every picture, and I was officially asian, but nope. I've been told that there's an entire catalog of asian poses, many of which can be found on this website: www.asianposes.com. I better start practicing.

Second, I need to make more asian friends. Apparently, one isn't really asian until they have a whole gaggle of asian friends to karaoke and gamble with. I don't gamble or karaoke, but if I have more asian friends, perhaps I'll start. I'll see you at the Casino.

Third? Well, I have to get back to my life. Everything (job search, networking, etc) has been on hold for the last five weeks while I've been overseas. Now that I'm back, it's back to the grind for me again.

I had a rocky start in Hong Kong, but by the time week five came around, I was sad to leave the island. The first two weeks were overwhelming -- first, I forgot about how my dad can be, and second, I haven't been around that many people since I foolishly decided to watch the 2003 Holloween Parade my first year in NY. By the third week, I finally felt comfortable being out and about in HK. I was reminded of all the outdoor activities, interesting people, diversity and awesome food the city had to offer. I saw friends I hadn't seen in a years. I learned to ignore my curmudgeonly dad. My mom was off on break, so I got to spend lots of time with her. It was really nice. If I didn't have plans to meet people in HK, I'd often take a walk around the lake at my parents' place, do a bit of yoga, pet the animals, watch some TV and do crossword puzzles all day. I was sad to leave my parents and come back to face life again.

03 January 2010

He said what?

The sign on my forehead must say if you're an old, creepy man, you ought to hit on me.

As I've mentioned before, my "uncomfortable place" (my defense when I feel insecure or threatened) is to be extremely polite. Unfortunately, old men just see that as a shiny neon arrow that shouts, "Hey, old man, you oughtta hit on me." I hate to break it to you, old man, but politeness doesn't necessarily equate interest. While I'm perfectly content to socialize behind a veil of politeness, the minute you start hitting on me, it ruins the night. I'm forced to be rude or leave in order to get away from your clumsy advances. Thanks a lot for ruining my night, creepy old man old enough to be childhood friends with my dad.

Let me provide some empirical evidence:

EXAMPLE 1: A 51 yo has been on and off pursuing me since he was 49. He tends to call, email, send flowers or cards whenever he's not dating more age appropriate 40-somethings. To the outrage of my then boyfriend, he even had the nerve to send me flowers on my 30th birthday. While I enjoy his company and think he's a smart, funny and charming individual, I'm not romantically attracted to him. Every time he crosses the line between us "catching up" and him hitting on me, I'm forced to flee the scene.

EXAMPLE 2: Shortly after I had been laid off, I went on a date with a 49 yo modelizer, aka The Silver Fox, who mistakenly thought I was arm candy material. (I swear I didn't know his age until our second date. He looked 40 and acted 12.) After our first date, I had already known that I wasn't into him, but I was observing my three date policy. (I'll go on three dates with someone even if I don't think I'm into him because first impressions aren't always correct. The only time the three date rule doesn't apply is if my date is egregiously offensive.) On our third date, The Silver Fox promised to take me shopping the next day if I'd go home with him. I declined and went home. The next morning, The Silver Fox sent me an email with a subject heading that read, "lets consummate our friendship tonight intimacy is very important to me," [sic] and attached a picture of two half-naked chicks. Now THAT was egregiously offensive. I had planned on waiting a few days to end things with him, but the email prompted me to pick up the phone and end things right away. (Remember him, under another "He said what?" entry?)

EXAMPLE 3: In my first week in HK, two ancient Californian expats hit on HS and me while we were catching up over drinks in LKF. They were so oblivious to our obvious disinterest, we were forced to leave the bar in order to get away from them. I had the misfortune to be the one talking to the sprayer, not the sayer. He ineptly hit on me by talking too close and spitting in my face with every "th" in the English language. All I could think about was how I desperately wanted to disinfect my face. Who knows where his body fluids have been.

EXAMPLE 4: In my third week in HK, I struck up a conversation with Brit expat M while waiting for J. I didn't get the dirty old man vibe from him and was reassured when he later confided to blond, blue-eyed J that he found Asian women unattractive. Knowing that Asia abounds with Caucasian men with Asian fetishes, I was relieved. He seemed normal and non-creepy enough for J to feel comfortable inviting him to spend NYE with her friends. It started off well enough - we met up with J's friends, and M's 17 yo son later joined us as well. We had fun until 3am when M drunkenly told me how ___(insert flattering adjective here)___ I was. He wanted me to spend the night at his place. In an effort to discourage further conversation on the topic, I told him such talk made me uncomfortable. I asked him what he expected me to say and that I didn't know what to say to his advances. When he continued to pressure me to go home with him, I left. By 3:20am, I was in the subway station, getting on a train back to my parents'. M and I could have been friendly acquaintances for the duration of my time in HK, but noooo, M had to go and ruin the evening by hitting on me when I in no way indicated I wanted the attention. M texted and emailed the next and following day asking if I'd have dinner with him before I left, and I politely declined.

I have three theories so far on why this happens to me, and I expect B to weigh in on this as well:

According to R, I "flirt" with everyone. When R and I were in Bonaire, I asked her to observe my interaction with people. I wanted to know when I gave off the "flirting vibe" because I've often found myself in situations where someone is telling me he's really into me, and I have no idea why he would think I might possibly reciprocate such behavior. After watching me interact with strangers and fellow windsurfers for two weeks, R told me that I didn't give off a "flirting vibe," but that I "flirted" with everyone I spoke to, man, woman, young and old alike. Whenever I'm speaking to someone, I am so genuinely interested in what they have to tell me about themselves at the moment that people who don't know me well aren't aware that I'm almost immediately disinterested in the conversation (and them) once I've left the conversation. After hearing R's observations, I couldn't help but wonder if I have a form of social ADD.

F thinks it's because I speak to strangers. According to F, I'll talk to anyone. And, not just talk in the way most people talk to each other, but with the same single minded focus I have when eating at a new restaurant or burger joint. She thinks my problems would be very simply resolved if I just ignore people when they speak to me. (F and I haven't been in a situation where we've been able to see each other regularly since high school, and she can't recall if I was this social back then. I was a shy, insecure kid as well as a late bloomer, so I think my whole talk to strangers thing didn't happen until my mid-20s.) I asked F how she ignores people when they talk to her, and she said she just waves a dismissive hand at them. F is adorable, so she can get away with that. If I were to go around waving people away when they approach me, I'd just be the stereotypical bitchy asian chick who acts like she's better than everyone else. You know who I'm talking about -- she hangs out at your neighborhood bar, pub, lounge, coffee shop, club, etc. Look for me the next time you're out and about. I'm the girl who's trying to have a good time by repelling people with a flick of her wrist. It reminds me of that episode of Seinfeld where Elaine pretends to be deaf so she doesn't have to speak to her gregarious town car driver, and then she gets caught in her lie when she overhears him tell his dispatcher that he'll pick Tom Cruise up later that night.

Personally, I think the problem isn't me, it's them. Creepy old dudes are vain egomaniacs who think everyone is into them. When someone with female body parts who isn't painful to look at interacts with them, they think it's because she's sexually attracted to them. In reality, the interaction has zero sexual tension or undertones. I could and would easily have the same conversation with creepy old dude's grandma. If I rocked a wee wee, I could say the exact same thing and creep-o would take me at face value. As a female, creep-o imagines every word I utter to be secret code for, "I want to get in your pants." The result? I get the dirty old man treatment. Or, perhaps it isn't them. It's me. I'm gender blind the way Stephen Colbert is color blind. Creepy old man, on the other hand, more than makes up for my gender blindness.

02 January 2010

Monkeys in Monkeyland

R invited me to go hiking with her friend J's church group. We took a short walk along the Shek Lei Pui reservoir in Tai Po and encountered quite a few furry faces. Check out the album by clicking on the link below the picture.

From Monkeys that live in Monkeyland

01 January 2010

New moon

would have certainly been more exciting had it been two hours of ass cheeks mooning me on the big screen. I promised L right before the holidays that I would watch New Moon with her, and she held me to that promise. I spent the first day of 2010 subjected to a painful parade of empty stares, pregnant pauses and cliche expressions monotonously and robotically voiced by Kristen Stewart and Robert Patti-whatshisname. The only good part of the movie was Taylor Lautner, who was surprisingly talented given the scope of his role. The movie dragged on and on only to come to no conclusion. Having read all the Twilight books, I can confidently say it isn't the story that sucks. Nor do I mind vampires, shapeshifters, the pacific northwest, etc. It's the screenplay that doesn't do the story any justice.

Wait, it's the New Year?

It's 10am on the first day of 2010, and I am stone cold sober. I have no idea how that happened, considering I got in bed at 5am this morning, but here I am, about to leave my parents' place to go watch New Moon (not my choice) at IFC with L.

First, I thought I'd leave you some images of the festivities last night. For more, go to the album.

The view from the Star Ferry Pier:



Underwhelming fireworks: